I am greatly saddened to have to miss both the Halloween Rumble and the upcoming 5 year reunion. My distance has proven to be a formidable obstacle to my active participation in IFS activities since school has begun. But I would like to take this seemingly lamentable situation and use it to the benefit of our entire organization. What I am suggesting will be demanding of you all, but the rewards will far out way the costs… I, the Rabbi of leisure, would like to invite you all to Durham, North Carolina, for the greatest New-Year’s celebration of the decade!!! IFS New-Year’s 2010 has the potential to blow your flap-staken’ minds and stir your syrup-pumpin hearts.
For those bold enough to make the journey, I guarantee:
• Life altering Barbecue (and many other varieties of food to clog the arteries but quicken the spirit)
➢ Diego- This means all you can eat, so get your shwammy-as-she-goes ass down here
• Beer that flows like wine (and for that matter, wine that flows like wine as well)
➢ If anyone can convince Jordan to come, the Mike’s Hards are on me all trip
•Scantily clad, sex-starved women, eager to experience the joy of uninhibited flap-jackery
➢ For Jimmy – Fish to have sex with
• Music so riveting as to inspire Bunch to dance, and make Nova want to sodomize Esteban
• A whirlwind tour of one of the south’s most vibrant cities (led by your own Rabbi of leisure)
• And most importantly a chance for our brotherhood to strengthen bonds friendship in yet another far-flung destination
Let me know how this sounds to all of you. If there is a will there is a pancake, so let’s do it!
Halloween is approaching and it is shaping up to be our strongest one yet. You all remember how fun our last group Halloween costume event was…this one will be even better, or should I say, HYOUUUGER.
Who: The International Flapjack Society, friends of IFS, and assorted gunt
What: IFS: WWF: Wrestlemania Costume Party…and Competition; best costume gets a HYOUUUGCHE Belt and pride and glory.
When: Halloween, Saturday, October 31st, nighttime
Where: Newport/Costa Mesa border, at the house of two IFS allies – Nephi and Sam (absolute praaahans), address soon to come – the house is perfect with a HYOUUUGCHE backyard.
Why: Because we can.
Participation in this event is already going strong. To keep those who don’t respond to IFS emails because they are the opposite of strong, here is a list of ‘who’s who’ for our upcoming WWF costume jam:
The Minister of R&S: The Ultimate Warrior
The Minister of Letters: Million Dollar Man Ted Dibiase
The Minister of M&T: Rowdy Roddy Piper
The Minister of MOM: The Rock
The Minister of History: Razor Ramon
The Minister of Rousing: John Cena
The Minister of ID: Ric “Nature Boy” Flair
The Minister of Comp: **Hulk Hogan**
The Minister of AP: Pending
The Minister of AD: Pending…The Undertaker?
The Minister of Health: Pending…Mankind? Sgt. Slaughter?
The Minister of Wardrobe: A wrestler…and not fucking Teen Wolf
Guest Member – Chuck: Andre the Giant
Guest Member – Ed: Irwin R. Schyster, I.R.S.
Guest Member – Sam: Jake the Snake
Guest Member – Nephi: One of the Island Boyz (tentative)
Guest Member – Mikey: Pending
Ok, that’s what I have so far. If I made a mistake or missed someone, then please amend this post with a comment.
Next Steps:
1) Comment on this post or respond to the massive email chain with who you are going to be.
2) **Invite girls to the event** – this is key, because a group of guys dressed up as wrestlers and getting drunk together **without **a bunch of gunt around would be about as gay as a Teen Wolf costume. Girls and friends of IFS don’t have to follow the Wrestlemania theme, though it is encouraged. If any of your girlfriends want to dress up as characters from Teen Wolf, that’s ok.
3) Be ready to respond to a Paypal email that R&S will be sending out shortly – each Minister will be donating $20 to our Wrestlemania cause. This will cover booze and decorations (see step 4). The Paypal account will also ensure that someone (R&S) doesn’t get fucked over with the bill.
4) We need decoration ideas – banners, posters, strobe lights…anything that will reinforce the WWF theme. Interior Design, this is your department, any ideas?
Ok, let’s remember, the more the merrier, so let’s brung heat.
That brings us to our next item, that is also fucking YOUUUUGCHE…
**IFS: The Quinquennium Anniversary**
5 Years. 19 Members. Dozens of M.O.M.s, dozens of C.B.s and handful of M.O.Y.s. Hershey, The River, Spring Training, Lake Tahoe. And now, back to where it all began.
This November, IFS turns 5. I’ve spoken with Letters about this, and we’re of the opinion that for such a grand occasion, less might be more.
For now, we’re thinking we start off with our typical Friday night invasion of State Street. Saturday morning, we feast. After breakfast we head over to the Hillside House with Letters, where he says that our presence (for an hour or two) will be greatly appreciated.
Next, we head back to the Mesa house where we setup for a late afternoon BBQ that slowly bleeds into a massive house party, to be accompanied by a surprise band…
Nice and simple. One thing that we need to discuss is a date. We can do this the weekend before Thanksgiving (Friday the 20th – Sunday the 22nd) or the weekend directly after Thanksgiving (Friday the 27th – Sunday the 29th).
Comment on this post with questions or suggestions. Let’s make this first Quinquennium a strong one.
- Rousing
In an attempt to be more ‘Diplomatic’ and ‘unbiased’ I want
to retract my previous post.I apologize
for offending anyone, however I posted for the simple reason that we need to
discuss a few very serious matters.All
matters will be put to a vote, including the ratification of the new IFS
constitution and sacred documents.The
original sacred documents were essentially defecated upon, both literally and figuratively.
I know some members are not planning on attending and some
members are not coming for very weak reasons. For those of you in such a situation I urge you to reconsider and show
up for the IFS Meeting.Some commitments
are not flexible, others are.IFS is
important and loses significance when members choose not to attend.
For those members planning on attending the meeting this
weekend, can we get an update on the plans? A dozen tickets were purchased for the Angels/Yankees game,
correct?Are they all spoken for and
what is the final roll call?Are people
congregating in the OC Friday night?If
so, what are the lodging and accommodation setups?Should a hotel room or two be reserved? Where will the meeting be held?
I appreciate M&T and Letter’s quick organization of this
meeting and am looking forward to taking care of business and then having lots
of fun with my Brothers.
From overseas we’ll come. So you tremble at our warning we’ll return next month. The night will be ours, but the battle is not yet over…
This will be my final post before our San Diego journey. As of today I have gotten commitments to come from almost everyone. Why don’t I name who isn’t coming: Health, Letters, Wardrobe, fish fornication, Schnitzel, of course our Germany contingent and Athletics? maybe? Does that mean only Photo/Wine is the only SB minister to make it to our spring meeting? Dad, wow. Call him what you will, Dane’s love for Philanthropy is big. (Auditory Pleasures and even Finance, yes Finance will be there)
Other than that I think we have everyone and I’m looking forward to a great weekend. I’ve got two rooms booked at the Beach Haven Inn in Pacific Beach. (4740 Mission Blvd, San Diego, CA) I will be trying to get off work as soon as possible and will head south with A&D, Comp and AP to go try and catch an Adolphus on the beach before sunset. We will be hitting the town Friday night and Saturday we will be going to a local park to have food and drink for our meeting. Philanthropy and I have discussed the breakfast and the park should be a relaxed atmosphere for us to hang around with friends and family, and drink early in the morning. But don’t worry, in order to follow the rules of our Society, Philanthropy has promised flapjacks. From there, the world of San Diego is our proverbial oyster.
The Minister of Revelry + Spirits, and anyone who visits Germany should travel to Mainz-Kastel, the birthplace of Adolphus Busch, where he lived until he was eighteen, at which time he left with three of his brothers for America. Did you know that Anheuser-Busch was not originally created by Adolphus, but his father-in-law, who was a soap manufacturer until he became owner of the brewery in 1860.
"You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are."
Yes boy’s that is correct, I made the trip to Amsterdam. I had the preconceived notion that I was headed to the Tijuana of Europe. My friends I was badly mistaken. The city is amazing, diverse and the vibe is one of the best I have ever felt. I would describe it as a more creative and sanitary San Francisco, with a population of 800,00 consisting of over 200 different nationalities. My friend Vanessa accompanied me on this journey. No sex involved. We arrived late and headed towards the red light district. On our way we stopped at a coffee shop, which is where the marijuana smoking is conducted. A cool ambiance, great music and grams of the most famous weed I had ever heard of, for 7 euro. In short, smoking man’s paradise. After that, we headed straight for the pretty red lights. A long street divided by a peaceful river had buildings on both sides consisting of glass doors that looked right into a prostitutes room, I would guess 500 overall. If the shades were drawn, congress was in session. There was every type for every desire, dressed in every possible costume. Although I was tempted, i did not pay the 50 euro charge. The next day we went to the Van Gogh Museum, and this is now my favorite experience thus far in Europe. Prints do not do him any justice. It looks as if he used to paint with frosting in the bright never before seen shades of colors. After that I went to the Heineken Experience, which was nice because now I can say I have been to the brewery, but I would have much rather gone to some more museums. Before I loose your attention, at night we went to a sex show. It was as you expected, a little too choreographed, but I did sit and watch. After fifteen minutes I was talking about day-to-day things as if there wasn’t a girl deep throating some guy ten feet in front of me. Everyone was just taking it easy, it was no big deal; it made me realize how much a culture can influence how you act. People fucking in public in Amsterdam= No Big Deal. People Fucking in Public in the States= Jail time, or in Vegas just getting kicked out of the club.
Thanks to the hard work and dedication of the Minister of Photography, IFS will soon indulge in a pleasant afternoon of wine chugging, I mean tasting. To review:
1) Meet in SB on 11/3/2006, for our typical opening night of revelry and catching up.
2) The Morning of the 4th: Rise early and hit the road to make our 7:30 am reservation at the Turnpike IHOP for our Two Year Anniversary meeting.
3) Meet back at the Mesa house around 9:45 am for the Minibus that will be picking us up at 10:00 am.
4) Taste wine for the next several hours, until our 4:00 pm dinner at the Hitching Post II.
5) Arrive back in Santa Barbara around 6:30 pm: Trade brings the heat (Jaeger) and we lose our minds.
6) Sunday morning / afternoon: The Mesa house throws a Backyard BBQ (point man for this event – Minister of Athletics).
7) Sunday evening / night / late night / Monday morning: The Dark Drive Home.
Now before you complain (fuck you), meeting isn’t early, it’s right on time; we do the Pancake breakfast every month, not the Pancake lunch. And quite frankly, our society has become lazy (myself included), so we’re gonnna do this meeting right. That means we’re up early and prepared – prepared to swear in, prepared to explain our positions (I’m sure we’ll have at least one guest member), prepared to discuss our beloved society’s future, prepared to clean our plates, and prepared to drink ALL of the appropriated Adolphi. Remember that our numerous accomplishments – Philadelphia, Vegas, the Website, the Anthem, etc. – started with us sitting around a table, eating flapjacks and drinking Bud.
As we ring in our Two year Anniversary, we must honor our society by treating it with the respect it deserves. So we’ll be dressing in Formal Attire: that means suits, ties, nice shoes, the whole deal. Let’s not waver on this point – we dress up for far less important events (interviews, nice dinners, weddings, etc.), so let’s all look our best. Also, there will be plenty of opportunities to wear our shirts this weekend, so bring them too. If the ties are ready by then, we can all wear them – if not, then we’ll just have to wait for Wardrobe’s Spring ’07 line.
So let’s celebrate the International Flapjack Society’s Anniversary with all of the bravura that I know we’re capable of. This November 4th, let us remember all we’ve done and let us plan for all we will do. Comment or email me with questions or concerns.
Health on Sitting, Waiting, Wishing Everyone's been talking about the old man's balls.... intentionally or not
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RT9FPYt7na0
Health on Sitting, Waiting, Wishing It's hit the 2000 milestone.. I keep posting the link all over ESPN.com articles. This thing has to take off eventually. I just can't wait till Letters gets on Tosh.0
letters on Sitting, Waiting, Wishing most of it made its way onto the airwaves in one minute chunks... glad you guys like it. its almost at 1,400 views... if you have a facebook, share it, and we'll see what happens. in flapjack related news:
http://travel.yahoo.com/p-interests-35558454
mandrew on Sitting, Waiting, Wishing Nice work!! Was that piece made for the SB airwaves, or just for fun?
M+T on Sitting, Waiting, Wishing Awesome. You sound really good, but now I can't shake the image of Favre's balls.
Rousing on Sitting, Waiting, Wishing You sound fucking great Baggs. Strong lyric jam and nice Big Ben reference slam. Great work!
