Bunker and Warchild would not be pleased…


This post is directed at the Rabbi of Leisure and his ‘yes


2008-4-20 bus ride 001 a.jpg

“Okay, so this is where you tell me all about how locals
rule and yuppie insects like me shouldn’t be surfing your break and all that,
right? No. That would be a waste of time. We’re just going to fuck you up….on
the blogosphere.”


True Story:

 On a sunny afternoon 4 guys (3 IFS members) struck out on a
surf mission to a local spot.  This spot
was actually featured quietly in the hit movie ‘Point Break’, including a famous
‘localism’ intimidation scene. 

Although this surf spot is no secret, it is a bit off the
beaten track and I won’t go into the etiquette and complexities of showing up
at an uncrowded, quality surf break with only a few people in the water, but in
short, you must be respectful and tread lightly. 

After the OC crew took a trip back to the car to fetch sun
screen to prevent dry skin and rashes, we hit the water.  OC team leader quickly surfs a set wave,
while OC towel boy cheers him on by hooting and hollering. “There’s not enough
wax on my board. This water is cold, I wish I had a better wetsuit, I usually
wear booties, my feet go numb easy.”
were a few choice expressions from the guy
you don’t want talking to you in the lineup.

After more than an hour surfing in excellent conditions, our
esteemed Rabbi of Leisure realizes he is late to take his 17 year old sister to
the Kanye West concert in San Diego
by 7pm.  A mid-lineup freak out ensues, “We’ve
got to go! MOM! Art and Design! towel boy! we have to go RIGHT NOW!  I’m so late, oh my god, oh my god!”
The Rabbi

I reluctantly paddle for a wave and ride it to the beach
where I proceeded to question the Rabbi about the seriousness of his public outburst.  (Direct Quote)  “My parents are going to be so pissed” he relayed with the utmost
urgency.  “Can’t you find someone else to
take your sister to the Kanye West concert? 
Why can’t she drive herself, she’s 17.”
I manage to say without laughing at the reason for our
immediate departure. 

At this point A&D and I were not prepared to leave a beautiful,
almost empty lineup for a seemingly ridiculous errand.  After serious negotiation and justification I
allow OC team towel boy to drive my car back to town so team OC can return home.  (I allow OC team towel boy to drive, since
the Rabbi can’t drive a car with a manual transmission.)  “We’ll either get ‘Competition’ to give us a
ride, or we’ll take the bus.”

Two OC ‘tenderfeet’ depart in a hurry, driving my car. “Utah! Get me Two!”

After a few more hours of empty, beautiful surfing
conditions A&D and I are exhausted and content with bellies full of tasty
waves.  30 miles from our house, “Gee I wish
we had a car.”

After a small walk to a bus stop, A&D and I bundle our
dripping wetsuits into hobo packs and wait patiently for the Express #3
bus.  “How did you get your boards here?”
the bus driver inquires.  “We drove a car
here, but then someone took our car back without us.”
We replied.  “Someone stole your car?!” he exclaimed.  Not exactly.

We were placed in the back of the bus where our boards would
fit in between the bench seat.  The
driver had to ask a couple of day laborers to move to accommodate our equipment.  The picture above was taken on the bus and
illustrates our frustration with our tenderfoot surf companions and also
captures the beauty of public, urban surf transport.  ‘Viva los Dodgers!’ A&D and I share a
laugh on the enjoyable and peculiar bus ride back to town.  Competition picks us up at the local bus
terminal and we return home.

Please understand, I post this story not as an example of
why I’m cooler or better than our companions. 
I post this story to highlight ridiculous behavior which fulfills the
stereotype of everything you try and avoid. 
When a 25 year old is begging his friend to help him, because of the
threat of parental repercussions and Kanye West concerts, you have to laugh at
yourself.  It’s important to listen to
yourself speak and make sure you sound sane. No harm intended, just a bit of

“Back off Warchild, seriously.”

5 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. nova
    Apr 22, 2008 @ 08:44:49

    please take some pictures of that cute lil’ guy all dressed up in a cap and gown, wish i could be there to zip up the back of his gown. congrads cutie pie.

  2. MOM
    Apr 21, 2008 @ 11:26:50

    They just left us. Towel boy needed a ride back home with the Rabbi so my car was not returned to me. Simply left in my driveway with the surf equipment they borrowed still laying in the back. Spram.

  3. chulango
    Apr 21, 2008 @ 10:24:34

    I’ve had some low points.

  4. M+T
    Apr 21, 2008 @ 09:46:10

    So what happened, why did your car not get returned to you? They just left you? Or did towel boy drive the Rabbi up to LA and had to drive him back?
    We move in with our parents cause we can, and don’t like taking up residence on couches.

  5. chulango
    Apr 21, 2008 @ 07:58:47

    Is towel boy of Swiss descent? And why does everyone from Orange County move back in with their parents after college? I don’t get it.