I Have the Coolest Job of the Group!!!


Here is an average day in the life of Scott Baumann, laser extraordinaire (in training):


First, fly across the country and use satellites and computers to find the laser hole.


Then, after using satellites and computers to find it, reach through ice and water to finger the laser hole.


After the laser hole and been thoroughly fingered, go directly to Anchor Bar in Buffalo, NY, the place where Teressa Bellissimo invented Buffalo wings in 1964.


Finally, eat as many wings as you can.  These are quite simply the best wings your humble Minister of Not Writing the Defense Report has ever seen and/or eaten.  They were huge and tender and perfectly fried.  The bleu cheese was so creamy and tangy that I thought for a moment I was giving Mark a blow-job.  The celery and carrots were pretty much the same as they are anywhere else.  Oh, and to boot, we also had pitchers of McSorley’s beer, which is beer that is brewed for and by McSorley’s Old Ale House, the oldest and most bad ass bar in all of New York City.  Jordan will confirm this for me.  They have a $2 cheese and raw onion plate that is to cheese plates what Anchor Bar wings are to wings.

Living the dream.  Sorry about your face.


P.S.-  Thank you Fricker for getting me this job.

5 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. trade
    Feb 21, 2007 @ 21:27:33

    Watch out Booman, your job might be in jeopardy..

  2. baggs
    Feb 21, 2007 @ 20:41:04

    just remember next time you’re out there jimmy, no means no.

  3. maritime
    Feb 21, 2007 @ 20:07:38

    hey defense, I think I have those same boots that I used to wade through dead fish

  4. the artist soon to be formerly known as trade
    Feb 21, 2007 @ 19:48:11

    Wow dad.. and I thought counting percocet was cool

  5. mandrew
    Feb 21, 2007 @ 16:24:27

    I was my pleasure, I can live vicariously through your travels and view your laser holes on my computer screen. Hope we both don’t lose our jobs, jam.